Day 13...

Chains of love

Mom' s Gold Chain.

Mom' s Gold Chain.

Lets's take this down a notch shall we? Van's, Men's button down, structured sweatpants.

Lets's take this down a notch shall we? Van's, Men's button down, structured sweatpants.

Like the post about the Ferragamo shoes, a heavy gold chain can veer dangerously into two directions, rapper or poncy "ladies who lunch" territory.  Now don't get me wrong, I love my ladies and we love to lunch, but when doing my research to make sure I used 'poncy' correctly;  I found it to mean exactly what I had thought:  "pretentious or affected.".  And that is exactly what both my mother and I could never stand.  the "better than's"  The people that drank their own Kool-Aid and thought they where hot suff. Drove her nut's, drives me nut's.  That is why I believe my mother surrounded herself with the coolest, kindest, smartest most amazing women I have ever met.  Her best friend when I was born (who was named my godmother) was a woman named Frances Cox.  She was an incredible woman, a teacher, a photographer, social anthropologist.  When my mom was struggling I used to wish I could live with her.  The irony of this is that her kids wished they lived with my mom!  Over the years, these women unconditionally looked out for each other, and for us.  Sadly, cancer took Frances before it took my mother.  That was a terrible heartbreak for us all.  Frances's daughter Kathy was by our family's side, up to the final hours before my mom passed away-almost as if Frances had sent her.  Which I believe she did, (but that is a story for a later post.) And it was not just Kathy, it was Sarah, and Hanne, and Michelle, and Vivienne, and Margot, and Lucy and Nora and more that I am sure I am missing (I'm so sorry)  but know that she loved them and that they loved her.  In the depths of mourning and despair we were held up by this net of the strongest, most incredible women in the world.  Her sisters, and now my default mothers.  That is a powerful testament to the kind of friend my mother was.  That she had friends like you. My grandmother used to say "If you lie down with dogs you'll end up with fleas..."  My mom, got that, and she surrounded herself with the best.  I also feel wildly fortunate to have what I consider to be a circle of girlfriends my own age that are just as incredible and special to me.  Truly I feel blessed.  And as a woman and a mother I feel it is my duty to make sure my own daughters surround themselves with the "good eggs"  with the kind girls, with the funny, smart girls, the girls that have their backs.  Mamma, you always had my back.  I hope to continue to be the type of woman that would make you proud.  Thank you for giving me the legacy of your incredible friends.  I love you all- xoxoxoxo

Thank you for reading such a long post!  I will be back Monday.  Thank you all for so much support.